Have you noticed how when everything first starts out, everything is exciting and new, there is an intensity to your relationship which causes you to step outside of the day to day world, your existence revolves around you and your partner, whilst you still have a life to live it plays second fiddle to the intensity between the two of you. At some point you will reach the point where the excitement starts to fade, you become used to each other and then one day you will wake up thinking that there’s got to be more to your relationship than this. When that happens it’s not the end of the world, you can find the spark again in your relationship and relight it.
Never, ever discount the power of physical touch. Physical touch can be a kiss, a touch, a hug, a cuddle, or you could hold hands, and then kiss some more. Verbal communication is vital to the success and survival of your relationship but no matter how deep and personal your conversation nothing conveys the same meaning as touch. Touch strengthens the physical bond between you and makes life so much fun. And don’t forget, kissing is probably the most intimate thing that you can do with your clothes on.
You need to spend quality time together where, no distractions, just the two of you. The time that you spend together reinforces your bond and helps to build a vast treasure-house of shared experiences and memories. Do things together that you can enjoy together. Share interests or find new ones to pursue. Find new things to see and do. Pretend to be dating for the first time or recreate your early dates. Don’t turn your time together into a dull, monotonous routine where you do the same old thing again and again. Make sure that you add some variety, add some excitement, and keep your relationship interesting and alive. You could plan ahead for significant dates, it gives you the opportunity to create something really special, and it gives you the anticipation of the wait. And of course spending time together gives you the chance to talk to each other and really connect.
As I keep on saying, communication is vital to the survival or rather existence of your relationship. By talking you create a connection into each other lives which binds you closer together. Talking brought you together, it helps you to find out about each other and to connect the two of you. Think about this, when you stop talking with each other how can you connect, how can your relationship survive, how can you even have a relationship? Even if it’s only for a few minutes in the day, you need a chance to talk. A great way to do it is to eat your evening meal together, maybe light a few candles and just talk. I think that it’s best for you to ban all talk about work, you have enough of that while you are at work, once you get home it’s time to relax and concentrate on the more important things in life.
You can talk to each other all you want, but if your don’t listen then what’s the point? You need to know what is important to your spouse if they have problems or ideas. If you listen and show that you are listening, then you are making a clear statement that you care about them, that what’s important to them is important to you and that they matter.
Keep the romance alive and the spark in your relationship will never go out. It’s easy to be romantic given that all you are doing are things that will make your partner happy. Let them know that you love them by word and deed. If you hug and kiss them, then tell them how much you love and appreciate them that will make their day. You can call them during the day. You can email and text, but to me that’s a bit impersonal, I think that it means far more if you take the effort to write and leave notes for your partner to find. If you really want to make an impact then send your partner a card. You can buy each other small gifts, nothing fancy, it could be a DVD of a favorite movie or a favorite brand of cereal. And if you are struggling for inspiration then you can both watch a romantic movie together.
If you want to give the spark in your relationship a boost then why not add some spontaneity into the mix. You don’t have to have a specific reason to do things, all the reason that you need is that you love your partner. So if inspiration takes hold of you then why not. Certain elements of spontaneous behaviour might be difficult when you have kids, but they’ll not be in the home all the time.
It doesn’t take much to find the spark in your relationship because it never left you, it’s just that sometimes you both forget about it. You need to commit to work together to create the best possible relationship that you can! Building your relationship will be a never-ending job because as your relationship develops you will always find new ways to improve things. Realize that you do not have to spend your life a slave to the T.V, there is a whole world of opportunity waiting for you and your partner to enjoy. Be happy with who you are and don’t try to change each other, be glad that you are together and do your best to make the most out of your time together. Just because you are getting older it doesn’t have to mean that you need to grow up, you can be two kids in love for as many decades as you want.